APRIL 18

April 18th 2017

My new year project is about
becoming me again.

For a while after 2011,
I did everything safely,
not too much,
lots of rest,
enjoy what I could.

In the spring of 2016
when they told me
the drugs were no longer working,
I sank into a sort of depression
and did not really care
about "me"
how I looked
what I did
or ate..... just sort of existed.

Now they say
I am in some type of
semi remission state.
Honestly some times I am not sure
they even know
what they are talking about.

But
I do feel better,
look better,
and I have decided looking better
and treating myself better
may be part of
getting to the point where
"the happiness project"
begins to actually be a normal
part of my everyday life.

I am going to find a way
to have my cake
and eat it too.

Today I signed up for a quilt class,
and put my name down
for a couple other classes.

Did not accomplish much more
than that because
I have been freezing all day.
I am hoping I am not coming down
with anything more than
a simple case of exhaustion.

So,
I am off to bed now.
Lots of blankets
and hopefully lots of sleep.

Good night from John Street